Lead Racks

The orange rays of the waning sun fanned out ominously as it descended slowly but with seemingly gathering speed behind the dark hoary outlines formed by the mountain ridges that stood noiselessly but listening attentively to the bold and old climbing stories that reverberated around the balcony bar. The beer was flowing easily and the story although told being told for the tenth time still sounded unsullied and captivating to the group listening keenly. These stories only develop from the top days out on the hill, the ones that leave you with a feeling of self satisfaction whether it be a classic ridge scramble with breath taking views or a hideously deceptive Severe that really should have been written up as an E1 (or so it normally says in my logbook), no thoughts of work or family commitments fight for processing room in your brain as you and your mates enjoy their limited freedom on the hills. We have just had one of those days although as I type I guess, after reading this, some of you are about to think for not all the right climbing reasons but hey ho! We were sat having breakfast in our small Bavarian lodge run by the more than welcoming Tina and Chesty, situated on the edge of the southern Bavarian Alps. We had just finished the cheese and ham is not really a breakfast debate, (I realise politics and climbing don't mix but something else to debate before we throw our hat totally into the Euro I suppose).  Anyway I digress, currently Bavaria is not a top Brit climbing destination by any means but it is nicely quiet with an absolute shed load of climbing whether sports, trad mountain or klettersteig - we were here to play on the wires and maybe try (and fail again) to get strong on some good old bolted routes in the sun. The despondent glance through the net curtained window in our breakfast room confirmed that the "Sky" weather report currently being shown on the TV was indeed correct - it was raining on our little corner of the world and the TV said it would be for the rest of the day. On the other hand though, the southern tip of Austria had a little sun on the map, so after another cup of fairly good Schwartz tea we decided that the two and half hour drive south into the future President of the America's home country (points at the end if you have guessed who it is), was the way ahead.   The drive was scenic, but the IPOD wouldn't work so we had to play guess what the  German/Austrian DJ was talking about, which would only keep the driver and his navigator amused for so long. We had one of those "thank God we are still alive moments", when a large container lorry appeared on our side of the road on a blind mountain bend, but we are still here and some of our tyre tread is still there.

Even though we had only eaten breakfast 1 and ½ hrs ago the compulsory Golden Arches stop for early morning Apple Pie and the all important caffeine injection. Not that I am into scams but we have an acquaintance, who if in a minibus of 15 people or so, will sit next to the door and make sure he is first to get to the counter of the Maccy Ds while everybody else is stretching and yawning so he can ask the manager for a free meal if he brings 14 people in, to which the manager of course agrees, to then be greeted by 14 unassuming hungry customers. Works every time!

Feeling guilty at actually ordering a full blown "super size me meal" instead of the small Apple Pie before it was even 11am, we begrudgingly filed back into the van to drive the final part of the journey up the impressive and beautiful Oetz valley in the Austrian Tirol. It is well worth the constant stops to debus and marvel at the glacier fed river Oetz as it carves its way back down the valley.  This time Sky weather for all it's technology was wrong and the rain was here too. Frustration abound we searched for ideas before some one spotted the Dome of much Aquaness themed water park.

A swim and sauna was probably not a bad idea - after all we haven't really had a rest day as like everyone else on climbing holidays you feel cheated if you waste just a single moment of your trip with anything other than climbing, well except for beer maybe....

However, the smart arse in the back reminds us that none of us have swimming attire. Another good plan thwarted until Simon our well travelled group member responds with the fact that in Austria we don't need swimming costumes. Now I dare you to disagree, but with your mates at the base of a gnarly climb, it will take a lot for you to admit you are scared and ask for some-one else to lead , (well we all pretend it does don't we?), and so it was the same as we marched, with only a white towel held securely by an E2 death grip, into the sauna complex - everyone deliberately slowing to look at various incomprehensible Austrian signs to tactically allow others to take the lead. The last moment to run away scared passed as the door opened to the first sauna and we were greeted by a rather toned elderly gentleman, making his exit, with his lead rack on full display. How we suddenly all wished we had bigger lead racks - but then again don't we all? After 30 minutes in the sauna trying to pretend we were looking at anything but our fellow sauna users and feeling the effects of the previous nights alcohol consumption we found our way to the swimming pool which was an improved view as you could only see your fellow bathers' heads, meaning all fears about their lead racks being better than yours was only imaginary. We made top use of the two hours we had paid for. Visiting the health diner and ordering a bit of naked lunch was a novelty, but not your "Pete's Eats" fat boy breakfast by any means, but then again would you want to see everyone who visits Pete's Eats actually eat naked? And then a miracle happened - the sun came out. We must have been hardcore because while everyone else flocked to the sun chairs we packed our racks away (sorry - couldn't resist that) and made for the exits. Climbing really is the source! We had already recced the start of the "Reinhardt Schiestl" Klettersteig so we drove directly to the parking space at its base, just a little way further up the valley in Lagenfeld from the Aqua Dome. 300m of wire, graded at around fairly difficult, line the route to the top of an almost vertical crag where you find a picturesque postcard alpine meadow, with a very handy Alpine bar smack bang in the middle of it. We geared up, attached our Klettersteig rigs and started to ascend the wires, the first 100ft being vertical and for the inexperienced it is worth remembering that even when clipped in to the wire there is still the potential for a large fall and a factor 2 at that. So the initial 100ft of "full on vertical in your face" pulling up wires and re-clipping every 6 ft made it an interesting experience. The "rast" place as the Austrians call it was a welcome relief to regroup and have a drink to re-hydrate our systems as we were suffering from sitting in the sauna for two hours - being Brits we had had to get our monies worth! An over hanging section waited for us as we stepped from the "rast" stop and then we found ourselves moving over an awesome exposed traverse as we made our way around the large overhang that blocks further upward progress. Small pegs aided our advancement for feet and our hands found a routine with sliding along the wire trailing our cow's tails. The views were stunning - from the uninterrupted view down and across the valley to the snow capped silhouettes of the Austrian mountains to our south. And then Angelina Jolie turned up - well the Austrian version anyway, except she was better than the tomb raider because she did her own stunts. We hung onto the wires not daring to move as the blonde raider in a "Lara trademark" tight top with no harness or rope, wearing training shoes overtook us. We stared silently between our group of now not so smug Brits as we established the fact that it was definitely 500ft- "don't touch the crag as you pass" - directly down to the ground. What can you do but let ladies go first, and we dare not move for fear of sending the tomb raider into the abyss below. She passed us without hitch and we watched as she skipped up the wire, a proper little Heidi climbing through the next overhang with nothing but a perfect white smile to show for her efforts. The remainder of the klettersteig was fairly easy although if you were new to climbing the exposure could prove to be a stumbling block even though the anchor points, pegs and wires are regularly checked by the local Burgfurhers. We were still in shock I think as we totally forgot about the nicely situated Alpine bar during the walkout, (there I have admitted it in print!) and turned onto the descent track. A 15-minute walk along a well marked and trodden path and we were back at the van. We looked back up at the crag to trace the route we had taken. We really had met the Austrian tomb raider because there she was on the route again, already half way back along the traverse. It now struck us as to why the raider was wearing trainers; she must have run down from the top to get the next circuit of the climb in. Respect!

The two and a half hour drive home was a marathon of the name game, proving that some people do just trawl the Internet whilst at work gathering useless facts.

We de-bussed direct to the bar where before even the first pint had settled stories were already circulating about meeting Angelina and the size of Austrian lead racks.

Climbing continued for the next two days and some good sports routes were ticked, the crag just outside Bad Hindelang, mere minutes from the Hotel, is a quality day out if you climb around 6b/6c but none seemed to have the same dit value back in the bar. All too quickly the epic drive across Germany back to the Chunnel beckoned, France would have been quicker but not one of us were willing to give the French our hard earned money towards their tolls, especially as they get to drive in the UK for free - sorry climbing and politics again!

We are currently planning to go back but not until some of us have increased the size of our lead racks- anybody know any good mail order firms?

We stayed at the English Guest House check out their website:
www.englishguesthouse.com